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Sunday, November 4, 2012

Why This Election Was like Game of Thrones


For those not familiar with George R.R. Martin’s A Song of Ice and Fire novels or the tv show they inspired called “Game of Thrones” I will do my best to give a brief summary of the first few books so I can then make my point of why the 2012 presidential election is a direct mirror of their plots and themes. The books are the story of the kingdom of Westeros, which is at peace for maybe the first 200 pages of the first novel before everything spirals into constant bloody warfare. Two forces battle for the power to rule over the future of the realm; one side is the rich, sinisterly attractive, and chronically incestious Lannister family and the other is the North led by the earthy, dead serious, and in some ways incredibly incompetent Stark family. While the Lannisters mostly lie, cheat, and betray to get their way, the Starks battle on stubbornly behind the fading causes of honor and loyalty, usually ending up on the sharp end of the sword.
While the war rages and consumes the lives of Westeros’s citizens, far up in the North sits a long wall of ice protecting the realm from the dark forces of Martin’s fantasy world: giants, wild men, snow demons, giant elk, and zombies (yes zombies, one of the reasons these books are kicking so much ass). This wall of ice has kept the forces of evil out of the realm for centuries to the point where the zombies and giants are no longer even considered real. Men deny they ever existed, calling them myths. The only people of the realm that warn against the ancient evils are the learned one’s, the scholars and what Martin calls maesters which are the Westero accivilant of scientists.
What many of Westero’s citizens are unaware of is that the ice wall protecting them from the north is starting to give. The wall is poorly defended by a rag tag collection of misfits with little training. Zombies are starting to pop up all over and Wild Men are being sighted on the southern side of the wall. The dark forces are attacking in record numbers and the Giants are riding mammoths!

Things are not looking good for the realm’s future, yet nobody gives a shit. The Lannister leaders are too concerned about their gold and their command and winning the war. The North is too caught up in revenge and killing the Lannisters. The regular citizens are too concerned with not getting brutally murdered in the crossfire and just making a living in the meantime. The very existence of the kingdom is at stake at the wall in the north but nobody wants to talk about it. Everyone is busy sweating and struggling and battling over their little piece of Westeros, thinking about surviving today and not concerned with tomorrow.
Now, let’s fantasy flash into the surreal world full of bizarre creatures and intrigue that we call the United States of America. We have two sides battling over the “realm” arguing over the economy, the definition of socialism, and whether pregnancy makes rape consensual. On one side we have a political party that’s rather earthy, serious, and in some ways  incredibly incompetent (that would be the Democrats). On the other we have Washington’s Lannisters, AKA the Republicans: rich, sinisterly attractive, and chronnically incestious (besides the attractive part, that nails it). Both sides are locked in battle, slashing with the economy, thrusting with taxes, and letting their archers (spin doctors) let fly their sharp pointed bolts of spin, lies, and misdirection. All the while our own wall is breaking and the dark forces are charging through.
Climate change is making its presence known with more and more impressive displays of natural havoc. First it’s a little melting up north. Then it’s a drier season in some country you’ve never heard of. Then mile long chunks of the ice caps are breaking off and whole sections of the country you never heard of’s population are starving to death. We used to at least talk about this.
Climate change was not mentioned once in the three lame ass presidential debates that took place last month, the first time those two words haven’t appeared in that arena in a generation. It’s a little insane that the one issue that could very well define the future of humankind on Earth was not mentioned by either Barack Obama, nor Mitt Romney, nor any of the the three moderators that resided over the debates. Not that the citizens watching and listening cared or really noticed either. Nobody might have noticed until a superstorm named Sandy came along and beat the shit out of the east coast. That was our real world version of a giant riding a mammoth.

11-3-12

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