Brass Bows and Beats take Reno with Q-Bert & Lyrics Born: by Sam Clemens

Had a great time in Reno last weekend. Instead of giving my own take on it I would like to pass Dublin's World over to Sam Clemens who has written a feature on the whole experience. For those not familiar with Sam he has written for the Contra Costa Business News as well as writing a lot of the theater reviews for the Lincoln Elementary Gazette. I'll be honest, I think he's a prick. But I figured I would allow him to publish his stuff on my blog since it has to do with Jazz Mafia and Brass Bows and Beats.
So without further ado: here's Sam:
-Dublin

It was cloudy with a chance of magnificence Saturday morning April 8th as I, Sam Clemens, award winning and respected journalist, rode from the Bay Area to Reno with San Francisco's Jazz Mafia to report on the performance of Brass Bows & Beats, a hip-hop symphony by Adam Theis. I was smashed into what was dubbed the "East Bay Van", the fifteen passenger behemoth carrying all the Jazz Mafia members that dwell in Oakland, Berkeley, and El Cerrito. Arnell was driving with gusto and confidence. The other passengers were respectful as we made our way along the three hour journey to Nevada. Unfortunately I sat next to the rapper Dublin who made off color and ill advised comments all the way up (I am aware that this is his blog but I feel it is my journalistic duty to identify the man for what he is: an immature lout).
The vans arrived at The Grand Sierra at half past one o'clock at which point members of the Jazz Mafia broke up into their respective clicks. I was ditched in the parking lot but managed to find Joe Cohen and Dublin "decompressing" at the casino bar. They traded stories from the road that I don't care to repeat here while I helped myself to a lunch combination of whisky and beer.

It was then two o'clock and time for load in and sound check. I walked into the Grand Sierra theatre, mouth agape and brow grizzled as I found before me the largest stage in the world!! (and I'm not just saying that. Check the Guinness book of World records my good readers).
Adam Theis led the strings in a long and intense sectional while the vocalists practiced their stage blocking and the horn players sat in sweaty anticipation. Ben Yonas then stepped to the sound board and a line check began. Chaos reigned as mics fed back with loud banshee screams and people began to lose their composure. Drummer Pat Kortie stood up from his drum stool and loudly proclaimed: "I can't hear a f*#king thing in the f@#king monitors you motherf@*kers!!!" You could taste the stress on your tongue and feel the pressure closing in on you. There was a real danger of the stage swallowing the entire collective in one giant bite if people didn't get a hold of themselves.

After another four hours of sound checking the Jazz Mafia Orchestra broke for dinner and I made my way around the hotel, peering in at them in their different stages of dishevelment.
Drummer Eric Garland (yes, there are two drummers in Brass Bows and Beats. And a damn percussionist named Matt Lucas for crying out loud) could be found in his room going over the charts for the collectives' collaboration with DJ Q-Bert entitled "Q-Bert's Medley". Mr. Garland was stretched out on the bed while his room-mate, Mr. Kortie wandered around the room in a state of lull. Both seemed stoic and prepared for their performance as was Mr. Theis who breezed about the hotel in his calm before the storm.
Miss Aima the Dreamer and "Cake" Paige watched over the youngest member of Jazz Mafia, little one year old Orson, before passing him off to Mr. Lyrics Born.
Aspect McCarthy manned the bar backstage and served up tequila and whisky to those that needed their liquid courage before playing the largest stage in the world.

At 8 pm DJ Q-Bert manned his turntables and wowed the entering crowd with his legendary skills. A half hour later the Jazz Mafia Orchestra took the stage and performed Brass Bows and Beats in its entirety. Joe Begale sang with the soul and conviction of an angel returned to Earth to guard over all that is good and funky. Chris McGee followed suit, blowing the crowd back with his diamond encrusted lungs. Crystal Hall took forceful control and expertly lent her talent to the vocal proceedings as well.
All was good in the world until Dublin took the stage and strutted around like the pretentious prima Donna that he is. Luckily he only did one song before retiring to the backstage to wet his whistle. The show continued with DJ Q-Bert and LL Aspect McCarthy throwing scratches into the mix and laying down a layer of hip-hop goodness. Rappers Aima the Dreamer and Seneca Schachter put all they had into their rhymes as Mr. Schachter launched himself across the threshold from stage right to stage left. Breathtaking. Lyrics Born joined the ensemble as well and placed his trademark rhymes into the 50 piece orchestration flawlessly.

I was awed and moved to tears by the entire two and half hour performance until Dublin AGAIN took the stage and strutted around like peacock. I tried to boo from the press area but was over powered by the tremendous cry from the audience that seemed won over by the rapper's over done mannerisms and long winded rants.
The show came to a close and all members took to the casino where they indulged in alcohol and gambling. I followed Ben Yonas of Yonas Media around and witnessed him take over the craps game and win just enough money to pay for the gas that the vans needed to get home with.
I retired to my room while the collective made their way to the Grand Sierra bowling alley where they celebrated their triumphant performance with a series of strikes and gutters. On the elevator up I was accosted yet again by the beastly Dublin, who, in his blind inebriation, mistook me for an attractive woman and tried to lay hands on me. I fought him off and escaped to my room where I posted myself at the locked door until dawn, afraid for my safety.

This is award winning journalist Sam Clemens signing off.
Good luck and God bless the United States of America along with Puerto Rico and any other US territories.