We at Dublin's World are proud to present the first exclusive interview with Bottega Jesus West, the unborn child of Kanye West and Kim Kardashian. While it may seem weird for us to be interviewing an unborn child, it's really no big deal.
Q: Thank you so much for agreeing to this interview.
BABY: No problem. My pleasure.
Q: So, how's life?
BABY: Well, it hasn't actually started yet but from what I can tell it's going to be great. A lot of parties and things. Award shows.
Q: How are you dealing with all the publicity? How are you holding up?
BABY: Pretty good. It can be a little taxing at times though.
Q: Like when?
BABY: Well, the paparazzi are obnoxious. They have these super long lenses and they keep trying to get shots of me by focusing up my mom's uterus.
Q: Gross.
BABY: I suppose. But I float around in embryonic fluid all day so my tolerance is high.
Q: What are your plans once you are born?
BABY: I was thinking about a career in the arts but I've had second thoughts.
Q: Why?
BABY: It's complicated. What if I was successful? What if I became well known?
Q: So?
Baby: My father wouldn't stand for it. Not to mention my mother. Can you imagine how they would react if I was to pull the spotlight from the two of them for even a second? My God. It would be cataclysmic. For me to even make an attempt at music or art would be a direct challenge to my father's ego. If I won an award he would probably bum rush the stage and embarrass the shit out of me. (Laughter)
Q: Your dad is super talented in his own right. I'm sure he would be proud.
BABY: Maybe. My mom won't be threatened unless I'm born a girl. If I'm a girl she might think I'll challenge her talents.
Q: Her talents?
BABY: Yes, her modeling and film career.
Q: Her film career?
BABY: That's right.
Q: How do you feel about that tape by the way?
BABY: The one with Uncle Ray J? It's something that exists so there's not much I can do about it at this point. People can always throw it in my face if they want to try to shame me. I better get over it right?
Q: That seems like a very mature attitude for someone so young.
BABY: Thank you. But to be fair, the tape wasn't my mom's idea, it was her agent's.
Q: Oh really.
BABY: So was I for that matter.
Q: What do you mean?
BABY: I was my mom's agent's idea too. She wasn't getting enough publicity. No one was talking about her ass as much and her relationship with my dad wasn't getting as much print as it used to. So her agent thought it best that she get impregnated to keep her profile up.
Q: Are you looking forward to being part of our world?
BABY: I am. A lot of people consider it a nasty little fucked up place but I'm looking forward to etching out my own space in it and doing the best I can. I'm too young to be bitter and cynical at this point in my life.
2/2/13
Q: Thank you so much for agreeing to this interview.
BABY: No problem. My pleasure.
Q: So, how's life?
BABY: Well, it hasn't actually started yet but from what I can tell it's going to be great. A lot of parties and things. Award shows.
Q: How are you dealing with all the publicity? How are you holding up?
BABY: Pretty good. It can be a little taxing at times though.
Q: Like when?
BABY: Well, the paparazzi are obnoxious. They have these super long lenses and they keep trying to get shots of me by focusing up my mom's uterus.
Q: Gross.
BABY: I suppose. But I float around in embryonic fluid all day so my tolerance is high.
Q: What are your plans once you are born?
BABY: I was thinking about a career in the arts but I've had second thoughts.
Q: Why?
BABY: It's complicated. What if I was successful? What if I became well known?
Q: So?
Baby: My father wouldn't stand for it. Not to mention my mother. Can you imagine how they would react if I was to pull the spotlight from the two of them for even a second? My God. It would be cataclysmic. For me to even make an attempt at music or art would be a direct challenge to my father's ego. If I won an award he would probably bum rush the stage and embarrass the shit out of me. (Laughter)
Q: Your dad is super talented in his own right. I'm sure he would be proud.
BABY: Maybe. My mom won't be threatened unless I'm born a girl. If I'm a girl she might think I'll challenge her talents.
Q: Her talents?
BABY: Yes, her modeling and film career.
Q: Her film career?
BABY: That's right.
Q: How do you feel about that tape by the way?
BABY: The one with Uncle Ray J? It's something that exists so there's not much I can do about it at this point. People can always throw it in my face if they want to try to shame me. I better get over it right?
Q: That seems like a very mature attitude for someone so young.
BABY: Thank you. But to be fair, the tape wasn't my mom's idea, it was her agent's.
Q: Oh really.
BABY: So was I for that matter.
Q: What do you mean?
BABY: I was my mom's agent's idea too. She wasn't getting enough publicity. No one was talking about her ass as much and her relationship with my dad wasn't getting as much print as it used to. So her agent thought it best that she get impregnated to keep her profile up.
Q: Are you looking forward to being part of our world?
BABY: I am. A lot of people consider it a nasty little fucked up place but I'm looking forward to etching out my own space in it and doing the best I can. I'm too young to be bitter and cynical at this point in my life.
2/2/13
Hilarious, Dublin! Keep those interviews coming! Erin d. (Truckee)
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